Bangkok Blues

Bangkok had been called the Sin City of Asia. It's also been named a food lover's paradise and an exceptional place to visit. Likewise, a lot of bloggers have commented on how amazing Bangkok is. They rave about the food, the people, the adventure. Recently, the Hangover II immortalized the city's notoriety with the catchphrase "Bangkok has him now". However, I've come to a different conclusion about Bangkok in the eight nights I spent there. 

I think it's an absolutely boring city - especially for Asia. That's right, I said it: Bangkok is boring. 

I arrived from Ao Nang and found a hotel room smack dab in the middle of Khao San Road for 120 baht a night ($4). Khao San Road, as I had mentioned, is like a giant overdeveloped 24/7 frat party. Its got its charms, but they wear out quickly. 

Sukhumvit - another 'entertainment' district - is similar to Khao San Road, except with prostitutes. Here you can see amazingly overweight 70-year old American, British, and Australian men with remorseless arms slung around their 16-year old Thai 'girlfriends'. Sitting at a bar, the 65-year old retired podiatrist from Oregon started a conversation with me. He was sitting with a young Thai girl who was maybe eighteen years old. He claimed she was the love of his life. "See," he told me, "she doesn't deny it!" I looked at him puzzled. She didn't deny his claim simply because she didn't know English. 

In the middle of our conversation, he inched his hands into her pants and started indiscriminately pressing against her butt. He did this causally in the middle of a bar while telling me about how many other Thai women he'd slept with. I almost became sick.

Since he retired to Bangkok five years ago, he said he'd slept with at least one new bar-girl every night. So, he put the number at around 4,000 different women. 

After about ten minutes, it became apparent that my unease and criticisms weren't direct enough, so I tried a new approach. I asked him if he had any children. Quickly, he pulled his hands out of the young girl's pants and used it to pull out a wallet. He showed me pictures of his two sons and his daughter. She just turned 28. 

I'm positive the old man didn't comprehend the irony behind my question, because after answering his hand went straight back into the young girl's pants. She looked embarrassed and annoyed but didn't resist. How that old man wasn't embarrassed I'll never know. It was clear, though, that even she understood the irony behind what I had asked the old man. Her eyes gave away her own discomfort with what I'd just done. She was thinking "His daughters are my age and they'll never have to do what I do..." After realizing I was only embarrassing her, I left. It's a really horrible world we live in sometimes.

These are two tourist spots, but not all of Bangkok is a red-light district, right? Well, I don't find the rest of Bangkok to be much better. It's very ugly, dirty and haphazardly developed. It feels more or less a big mud puddle with a few statues made of gold near the middle. And although Thai culture is fascinating, Bangkok also feels lacking in it's diversity. It has a certain homogeneity to it that Singapore, Kuala Lumpur, and even Ho Chi Minh don't have. After a few days, there isn't any reason to go to a particular district when it's no different than the one you're in.

When I asked expats what they do in Bangkok for fun, they told me there was some great bars and places to eat in some of the Western hotels. But, lamenting on their words, I asked if they thought it was a little grotesque to recommend activities in hotels for boredom in a city the size of Bangkok. They shrugged.  

What was I doing in Bangkok for eight days? Waiting for my Vietnam and Myanmar visas. So, as soon as I recieved this things, I headed up to Chiang Mai via Ayatthaya.